We all love the sweet relief that comes from that wind-in-your hair feeling when you turn on a fan and stare directly into its soul. But then you zoom out and realize you’re looking at a hunk of black plastic in either the circle or square variety, usually with a few seasons’ worth of caked-in dust coating the slats. And, let’s be real — tower fans that masquerade as superior-designed objets d’art are really fooling no one. So when I spotted this retro Vornado fan, I saved the link for that time in the near future when I’d feel antsy enough at my desk to need to make an online purchase.
Every space has its air-flow challenges, and my apartment’s issues stem from it being the self-proclaimed penthouse of a fourth-floor walkup with skylights that make the space truly sun-drenched and the tenants definitely sweat-drenched. Each bedroom has a beloved window A/C unit, but the main kitchen/living room area gets stuffy as hell. To get the proper vortex swirling, you need a fan that can shoot that sweet air-conditioned air from the bedroom into the main room. In the past, I’ve messed with dinky plastic fans that never had the right horsepower for the job. This Vornado, however, circulates like a pro.
It handles every swampy nightmare with style and grace. Roommate cooking fish on a hot summer day? Throw open the window, light the palo santo, and crank that Vornado up to top speed. Did the heavens toss you a surprisingly crisp summer night? Open the window a crack, turn off the AC, and let the fan’s low speed give you the breeze you need to stay cool while you sleep.
Now for the sound check: I’ve never used a noise machine to fall asleep, but if I did, my top sounds would be Sexy Rainstorm, Wind Rustling Leaves, and Fan-Whir Lite. This Vornado fan gives me just the right amount of hum without any rattling parts that would keep me awake, wondering how people sleep with ticking clocks in a mile’s radius of their beds. The hefty metal frame keeps the fan grounded so the swooshing sound is light and consistent.